Snack Sized Portions

Once upon a time, a bunch of not very bright people in a room had a meeting.

Hang on, let me rephrase that. All meetings are a bunch of not very bright people in a room. I need to specify.

Once upon a time, some morons who worked in catering for supermarkets had a meeting to design new cakes. They also decided to consider the size of such foods, in order to encourage beeter efficency, and eating habits.

So, these genii went and made "micro cakes", with the seeming intention of causing RSI in the motion of moving arm to cake box continuously to take lots of small cakes because THEY'RE TOO FUCKING SMALL FOR ONE TO SATISFY!

Now, normal cakes and mince pies or scone etc are fine. They have thier purpose. What I'm moaning about is cakes which are deliberately "mini" to sound "cute" when in fact it means you have more filling, less icing, more wasted packaging holding the space between cakes and I think they actually encourage worse eating habits. If I'm eating small cakes, it's harder to judge how much I've had than if I have a huge great big "fuck off" slab of cake in front of me (preferably with a little Nandos-esque flag sticking out of the top with "cake" written on it.) which is why I find the fiddly bastards so annoying! I want cake, not "micro cakes", which are just sold to stupid fat people who think they'll loose weight by eating more of something smaller!

I may be fat, but I ain't thick- unlike the layer of pastry on a mini- mince pie. WHERE'S THE FILLING? HELLO? ARE YOU THERE? No, because the laws of volume and surface area mean smaller pie= less filling, more pastry en masse. Which means your eating paper with the heaviness of butter and less rum soaked shrivelled fruit (get any images of alcoholics and prostitution out of your mind immediately) which is never a good thing (unless in the instance of the aforementioned image I just told to you get rid of.)

Alas, I doubt my message of sanity will get through, mainly as cake manufacturers will never read this, and my ramblings are always pointless and inconsequential.

I'll just have to add "Non-minicakes" to the wikipedia "Superfood" list :D